I am a software developer. Have around 2.5 years of experience. I have always underperformed. Underperformed in school, underperformed at work. I have a different way of doing things. It is frustrating not to reach full potential and my coworkers are starting to give up on me.
I can take on things that are challenging and prototype the ideas I have. But I have tremendous difficulty focusing on mundane stuff. I started going to the gym everyday and it helps a little.
Because of my novelty seeking personality, I start side projects from time to time (all of which I managed to complete, thankfully!) So one of the side project took off in the past one year. I am having people email me everyday that they like it and would like to pay money for it to use all the features. I haven’t integrated the payment system yet.
I want to quit my day job and focus on my side project full time. Or even work as a consultant taking in additional gigs to supplant my missing income. However, I am not sure how successful I will be.
The only reason I am not yet fired is because I am personable, very enthusiastic and have lots of ideas. Somehow, the management thinks that I will improve with time. I have struggled with this all my life and working for other people is simply not sustainable.