Having to stay with female roommate who is very negative, and constantly is telling me my company will probably fail and never get funded and obviously doesn’t believe in me; after I finally made it to the official launch stage, to go into production

Actually that’s a good thing. At least you have a motivation to prove her wrong!

Anonymous says:

August 21, 2015 at 10:40 am

You shouldn’t run a company if that’s your only motivation, just to prove someone wrong.

He should ignore her and go his way. I assume she doesn’t have any business experience, and if she did she should give advice instead of being purely negative.

He will meet people that believe in him and people that will ignore him and it’s good that he starts dealing with that. Stay focused on the business and figure everything out.

Reply

I generally avoid discussing business ideas with certain people to avoid negativity – also many people will be negative simply because they are jealous (even people you know well or consider friends).

Of course it is important to canvas feedback – perhaps you should ask her WHY she thinks your business will fail, then you can review those factors and put some mitigation in place if necessary.

OP: I think maybe she resents me for some reason, maybe also doesn’t respect me much for being always tight on cash. Bootstrapped startup, but now that its in the fund raising round, I have some spare time to find a side job.

Hm, at least is kind and generous enough to let me stay at her place for a bit, even with having to feel like I’m somehow not doing enough, or not good enough. I’ve asked why, it was met with a strawman argument, and seems will only provide some positive feedback when it actually happens “ill believe it when I see it” kind of way; similar to the story “the little red hen”, which I think every entrepreneur would enjoy.

Dunno, maybe she just deals with constant criticism at her job and it is reflected in her interactions with others; shes like really nice when shes been drinking though. its weird. Could be jealous. Then again, maybe I should just not waste my time trying to figure out women; and just do what I can to make her happy while launching the company

Anonymous says:

August 19, 2015 at 10:52 am

Sounds like you’re staying rent free? If so then that’s something to be grateful for and also cut her some slack.

And you’re right, there’s no need to figure people out. In fact you should use this experience to prepare because as soon as you have something of value you’ll find there will be many jealous people and those who will try and take advantage of you. I’ve had people wanting equity just for having casual conversations related to my product!

P.s. Well done for getting this far!

Reply
Anonymous says:

September 2, 2015 at 9:16 am

Find her a healty man to cure her bad mood… or do it yourself…

Sometimes it works.

Reply

Ask her—- “what are your goals ” ?

Unfortunately there are a lot of people who are negative about everything.

You seem to find them everywhere and you can’t really get away from them.

Even from people who have startups.

Just don’t pay much attention to them. I use the rule of thumb. If one says it ignore it. If many different people say it. (Not family) there may be something to look into. dont let it upset you.

You had better get some thicker skin! If you let a roommate’s negative comments slow you down, how are going to face real problems like: 1) the bank says no and then the next one says no, etc. 2) an unhappy customer says your product is horrible and so are you. 3) you’re biggest deal to date falls through at the last minute. I could keep going. Being in business requires thick skin. Consider your roommate’s comments as pre-game warmup and be glad that they don’t cost anything.

Anonymous says:

August 19, 2015 at 5:55 pm

+5

Reply

Mmmmm, how I love such an “advisers”! If one is dummy then one of ten his/her advises will be USEFUL, if has broad-based knowledge – one of five. You’re getting FREE information – that is great!

How long have you loved her and not told her?

Comments like get thicker skin and basically just man up and deal with it aren’t solutions here. Obviously you should do that but it’s not solving the root problem at al which is finding support and people who believe in your vision. I was in this exact position and it was a nightmare bc I needed support badly but all the roommates did were try to cut me down and find reasons for me to not move forward. What I did was I identified what I actually needed and I was open and honest about that to them. I had a frank conversation and I told them that this is a soul crushing thing to do and I need blind support and I have to keep searching for that support until I get it. I had it with my family, friends and anyone I actually interacted with.

In the end everyone understood and when anyone turns the conversation negative I just don’t talk about anything having to do with the startup with them.

The most important lesson is to find the right people to surround yourself with and then explain objectively to the people you’re dealing with at the time the reasons why you can’t talk about anything. I found as long as I tell them honestly and obejecticely I cannot reach this goal if I don’t have this thing and while I might be wrong this is the best thing I have to go on based on my experiences so far. My roommates eventually understood when I explained things that way. It did piss me off tho that whenever something went really well they would minimize it and make me almost feel like I was still a piece of shit for accomplishing that new milestone.

I also agreed to do things like chores and stuff for them to offset the rent. I treated it like a business decision. Like I’ll work to pay off what I normally would have owed or something.

And of course I would tell them anytime something positive happened socially with respect to my startup. You know a news article, an exciting new partner, ect. They could see the social value so they knew they were supporting something important.

It’s hard because you have to balance btw pleasing them but keeping their contribution in check. And that’s actually a good lesson for life in general.

3satellites

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