At the end of my rope

After 3 years full time on my startup (sole founder), with young child and wife, I have thoughts of self harm with the constant stress of being asked to make more money and work less. I’m so messed up I asked my little one if she minded if I went away for a long time.

  • Please don’t do anything and please do go find someone to talk to.

    I have 2 under 4 kids myself, and cofounder of a startup so I understand the stress and what feels like the weight of the world. Those thoughts won’t help and acting on them will make the people you love’s reality a literal living hell.

  • I’m founder of a 3+ startup. I can promise you I had the exact same thoughts on at least two occasions. Don’t do anything stupid, things will get better. Also as mentioned above, find someone to talk to talk to. Best of luck.

  • Talk to your wife. Let go of the ego. You don’t have to bear this burden by yourself.

    Success can’t be forced. Even brilliant entrepreneurs sometimes need years before they reach profitability. You have to be prepared to be in this for the long haul, and you won’t be if you’re killing yourself mentally or literally. You gotta learn to love yourself, even when you feel like a failure.

  • Please don’t harm yourself. Keep talking to us here. We know how you feel.

    3 years is not a very long time in the life of a startup. Most startups barely break even at that point and that’s the successful ones.

    You need to find a way to heal yourself emotionally first and then find a way to keep holding on to your business while at the same time find a way to support your young family.

    Since we don’t know what part of the world you’re located in it’s hard to say how you could make additional income while you continue to nurture your business.

    I built a successful online business selling to customers worldwide. The business started in 1998 and grew every year until the Great Recession hit and it’s been in decline ever since.

    Last week I contemplated shutting it down just because I was so stressed by the state of the world and could not see any hope for a recovery anytime soon.

    My wonderful husband encouraged me to reduce expenses even further and continue to hold on to the business for as long as possible so that’s what I’m doing. The thought of shutting down after 17 years was just too depressing.

  • Something a lot of people forget often. The fact that you can wake up in the morning having the choice to do something with your life is a luxury so many people in this world don’t take for granted. This is not to compare your problems to others, but you can make choices and impact your life. Take it easy and remember why you’re here…

  • For those struggling with this challenge, I understand exactly how you feel.

    I’ve had 15 ventures, and after a stellar success which cost my 1st marriage, 2 concurrent failures cost my failures.

    I also spent almost 7 years as a volunteer councillor in suicide prevention> So I know a little about depression, loss and coming back from failure.

    And not enough people are able to share their stories publicly. But I just have.

    But rather than copy the story here, I’ll share then link to this 2 part. And I guarantee that after after reading the 2nd article, you will feel inspired.

    And I’m happen to discuss any issues

  • I am in nearly the same boat; in the same waters at least. My brother gave me a piece of advice when I was a kid, about suicide; it has given me strength. I don’t share this advice because it works for me but might offend others.

    However, what I will share is this: life is more important that anything else. If your life is shared with a wife, and you have created other lives that count on you, then spend 30 days putting your successes and failures in a timeline and share that with your wife. Tell her that you need help in understanding the next step for the family.

    Your wife and child are not worth jeopardizing for a startup. But it is important to be transparent with all aspects of your life.

    My startup and wife are on opposite side of the spectrum at the moment, and weren’t always so; but as time and lack of cash-out success continues, I am sucked dry emotionally trying to love both my wife and my startup. My children are fine, we haven’t missed payments, and they are not materialistic, but it makes for a rocky household which is not good for kids, I think.

    Don’t ever take your life; it is not yours to take, your friends, family, neighbours, and country need you. Trust me, your startup is more difficult than your life. If one has to go, then don’t end them both.

  • Take stock and realize that failure isn’t the end of the world. It sucks for a bit but whatever, in the grand scheme no one cares that you failed. Either find balance or look for an exit imo. Remember there are many more failures then successes so don’t let what others think about you get you down friend. The stress is brutal but hang in there, try and get things in perspective and remember its just work. Don’t be too proud to talk to people either. Nothing to be ashamed about. We all have our stress thresholds.

  • {"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}

    You may also like